It's a new day

I have been feeling better and getting used to my new body. It is still hard to look at but I got some good news from the Dr's that lifted my spirits.

I went to Stanford on my own on Monday as a followup to ensure the incision is healing properly. Not only is it healing great, I was able to get one of the drains removed and the remainder is much easier to manage and is not as noticeable. Thank God!! That was half the battle in my sour mood.

Also while at my appt with the plastic surgeon, I got a message from my other surgeon that the pathology report was back. They take the tissue and test it to let you know if there was cancer or not. I went over to her office after my first appt and although it was the end of the day was able to catch her still in the office and had an impromptu meeting to review the results. What made me so happy about that spontaneous meeting is, as my sister and husband can attest to, I have spent hours and hours waiting and waiting for dr's that that are late or behind schedule. I was so pleased with myself that I was able to track her down and get the results of something that would have taken me all day to get at a regular DR's office visit.

To top it off, it was really good news. This sounds strange but the good news is they did find cancer but the part that is good is that they got it all out. The margins around the cancerous area were clean. There was also DCIS (the undeveloped cancer) and that was also removed and had clean margins. The 2 final lymph nodes taken from my side were also negative, no cancer at all. Fabulous, there is no spread to worry about. So in other words, if I had not gone with the Mastectomy, I would likely have seen a recurrence again at some point, maybe 5 yrs, maybe 10, maybe more but I would possibly have had to go through all this again.

The mastectomy was the right choice, the right thing to do. All the struggle with the second opinions, PET/CT scans, MRI's, switch of the Chemo, and many, many Dr appts have been worth it for this moment because it is gone. I really believe I am free of cancer.

It was late when I finally got ready to drive home, around 6:00 pm. I finally allowed myself to be happy. And just like that a song came on the radio that seemed to say exactly what I was feeling. Matchbox 20 named "How far we've come" the lyrics say "I believe it's all coming to an end".... "let's see how far we've come"..."let's see how far we've come." For me that was it, I blasted the song alone in my car and sang out loud "Let see how far we've come". I have come a long way and I am really proud of myself. (I tear up as I type this). This has been really hard but I feel "This is coming to an end". It was like that moment in the movie "Jerry McGuire" when he had signed the big contract with the football player and was searching for a great song to blast and celebrate alone in his car. HAHA

From here I may have radiation (no problem), and hormonal therapy for a year(no problem). Also reconstruction surgery (this may be a bit tougher). But I think I can handle it.

So I am sorry for the depressing blog entry earlier. I was feeling really low so I let you all know about it. But I am feeling better now. Thanks for being there.


Britt