Hi all - I know, I know, it had been forever since my last post and I guess it can be seen as a good thing that I have been able to move on from my day to day existence of dealing with Cancer to other things that occupy my day to day existence. I do have a piece of good news though, I got recent MRI results back and they came out great. The results were basically "unremarkable", at a time when every test seemed to come back with bad news, an "unremarkable" test result is great. It is just what you want, not much to report. It said I still have fluid around my chest and breasts from the blood clot but there is no Cancer. So that is great news I wanted to share. I still feel effects of the blood clot since I still feel light headed once in a while. I have been thinking about going back to the reconstruction surgeon to start discussions about another surgery to "fix" my current result but I want to be sure that the blood clot is completely dissolved. I am also very in tune with any thing going on in my body. I guess that is a good result from this experience. I have had pain in my hip for about 2-3 months now. At first I immediately thought, "Oh no, I have bone cancer in my hip bone." That was dismissed by my Dr's but I think I will bring it up again at my next appt. You just never know. That is what sucks about this, you just never know....
I am also thinking of training and raising money for my first Cancer walk. I am thinking of an Oct time frame, Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Lastly, I have been invited to be part of a planning group at Emanuel Hospital (where I had my treatment) in a Cancer Awareness event in Oct as well.
So things are good with me, hope all is well with you.
Britt
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
things are moving along
Hello all- It has been a while since I have updated the blog. It has been on my list of things to do and now even with Christmas around the corner, I have the time, so here goes.
A couple medical updates. I had my surgery on Sept 11th and now we are at the end of Dec, over three months ago and there is little to no change to my "new" breasts or their uneven size. So I am stuck with one side (mastectomy side) being cup size A/B and the other being a C/D cup. For women, you will understand how big of a difference that is. My Dr thinks I am still working out the fluid in my upper extremities but I think it is pretty much as good as it is going to get. If I want anything different I will probably have to go under the knife again. I probably will go back but not right now. I am going to continue to be patient and hope that I will somehow even out but I am realistic. So overall,I am pretty disappointed in the results of the surgery. The plastic surgeon said once the blood clot came into play, it was hard to determine what the result would be. There was no way to know how I would heal. Well I healed pretty uneven and it sucks.
For the last couple months I have had Physical Therapy once - twice a week. I liked going because it made me feel like I was doing something proactive to help my situation but the drive was long and I dragged poor Erin with me most times while Paige was in school. I would wake up with my face so swollen you would think I was punched in the face. It would take most of the day for the swelling to dissipate. Now after several weeks, sometimes I do wake up swollen but it goes away pretty quickly. There still may be fluid built up in my body but my circulation system is better able to deal with it now. So that is good and I don't even need PT anymore.
I had an ultrasound to determine how the blood clot is dissipating. The clot is no longer even found where it originally started, (under my right arm). But there is some "residual thrombus", means buildup, in my jugular vein. Although it is not dangerous, it does mean that I am not getting full blood flow to my head right now. That would explain why I am still getting light headedness and dizzy spells when I stand up quickly or lean over and stand up. I knew something was not right in this regard so at least there is something medically telling me my symptoms make sense. And again after three months, I can say even the light headedness is going away.
I am still on the drug, Coumadin, which thins my blood. Chances are I will be on this for the rest of my life because during the treatment of the blood clot it was determined that I have a genetic tendency for Blood Clots. Too bad it took me getting one to realize this. With all the surgeries I had, I am lucky I did not get one earlier. Once you are on blood thinners you have to be careful that your blood does not get too thin, or if you were cut, you could bleed too much. As it is, if I cut myself shaving in the shower, it bleeds and bleeds and bleeds and then it stops. Also if my gums bleed after brushing my teeth, it just keeps going. It is a pain but manageable.
So all and all, I have to be happy, yes it has been a long journey but I can say I am coming to the end. I am feeling pretty good, and looking as good as I can muster right now. My hair has grown in beautifully and I love the 20 min complete morning schedule (from shower to full makeup). It is so easy, I am reluctant to grow it long again. Yes, I will probably have to consider surgery again but that is on the back burner. And we are all so looking forward to Christmas this year. It will be a great year with Erin understanding Santa better and Paige has been really sweet using her own money to buy presents for her family. Merry Christmas to everyone who reads this and Happy New Year. It will be a happy one for us.
Britt
A couple medical updates. I had my surgery on Sept 11th and now we are at the end of Dec, over three months ago and there is little to no change to my "new" breasts or their uneven size. So I am stuck with one side (mastectomy side) being cup size A/B and the other being a C/D cup. For women, you will understand how big of a difference that is. My Dr thinks I am still working out the fluid in my upper extremities but I think it is pretty much as good as it is going to get. If I want anything different I will probably have to go under the knife again. I probably will go back but not right now. I am going to continue to be patient and hope that I will somehow even out but I am realistic. So overall,I am pretty disappointed in the results of the surgery. The plastic surgeon said once the blood clot came into play, it was hard to determine what the result would be. There was no way to know how I would heal. Well I healed pretty uneven and it sucks.
For the last couple months I have had Physical Therapy once - twice a week. I liked going because it made me feel like I was doing something proactive to help my situation but the drive was long and I dragged poor Erin with me most times while Paige was in school. I would wake up with my face so swollen you would think I was punched in the face. It would take most of the day for the swelling to dissipate. Now after several weeks, sometimes I do wake up swollen but it goes away pretty quickly. There still may be fluid built up in my body but my circulation system is better able to deal with it now. So that is good and I don't even need PT anymore.
I had an ultrasound to determine how the blood clot is dissipating. The clot is no longer even found where it originally started, (under my right arm). But there is some "residual thrombus", means buildup, in my jugular vein. Although it is not dangerous, it does mean that I am not getting full blood flow to my head right now. That would explain why I am still getting light headedness and dizzy spells when I stand up quickly or lean over and stand up. I knew something was not right in this regard so at least there is something medically telling me my symptoms make sense. And again after three months, I can say even the light headedness is going away.
I am still on the drug, Coumadin, which thins my blood. Chances are I will be on this for the rest of my life because during the treatment of the blood clot it was determined that I have a genetic tendency for Blood Clots. Too bad it took me getting one to realize this. With all the surgeries I had, I am lucky I did not get one earlier. Once you are on blood thinners you have to be careful that your blood does not get too thin, or if you were cut, you could bleed too much. As it is, if I cut myself shaving in the shower, it bleeds and bleeds and bleeds and then it stops. Also if my gums bleed after brushing my teeth, it just keeps going. It is a pain but manageable.
So all and all, I have to be happy, yes it has been a long journey but I can say I am coming to the end. I am feeling pretty good, and looking as good as I can muster right now. My hair has grown in beautifully and I love the 20 min complete morning schedule (from shower to full makeup). It is so easy, I am reluctant to grow it long again. Yes, I will probably have to consider surgery again but that is on the back burner. And we are all so looking forward to Christmas this year. It will be a great year with Erin understanding Santa better and Paige has been really sweet using her own money to buy presents for her family. Merry Christmas to everyone who reads this and Happy New Year. It will be a happy one for us.
Britt
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Great night for Paige
Thursday night was a great night for our family. It was the evening of the annual Cancer Awareness Event at Emanuel Cancer Center in Turlock. Paige was invited to read her book to the audience of 300-400 people. Over the last 16 months Paige has documented, in her own words, her experience being in a family dealing with cancer. Her Grandma helped her edit the book and they published it. Perhaps some of you have already read it. The staff at Emanuel loved the book so much that they have incorporated the book in their "Monkey Business" cancer support groups for kids and she was the "opening act" for the keynote speaker of the night, Kelly Corrigan, author of "Middle Place". She is also a young mother and Breast Cancer survivor and her book is on the New York Times Best Sellers list. I believe she also appeared on Oprah. The family and I had also been asked to be part of fund raising efforts by lending my picture, with the girls, and my success story to print materials such as brochures and newsletters. I was happy to do that if it helped raise money for the Cancer Center.
Anyway, we arrive the evening of the Event and there is a large tent and tables set up with all kinds of things. On one table is the brochure with my face and the kids faces in the cover. The fundraising efforts had paid off, they were able to raise their goal of 4 million dollars!!! We were then invited to meet Kelly ahead of time before the event and so she and Paige spoke for a long time about her advice for a young author. It was cool to have "inside access" and for Kelly to take such an interest in Paige and her book.
Back out at the tent, the cancer survivors gather in the back of the tent for a Survivor March to open the evening. It sounds kind of hokey but it is really a wonderful feeling to walk through that tent with everyone cheering you on. I was so proud to be walking with other women who had fought and won the battle. They play the song "We are the Champions" which is always a tear jerker. The previous year I had walked in the Survivor march, I was in the group of survivors "One day to One year" since diagnosis. This year I was in the group "One year to five years" since diagnosis. I did not cry during the procession until I laid eyes on Brian and he was welled up as if to say "See, look how far we have come". I hugged him tightly and cried a little in spite of myself. I also was able to march with some new friends I had made through support groups and such, so it was nice to be surrounded by people I knew and felt comfortable around. The nurses and Doctors and staff are all people I have become so close to since I have spent so much of my life in this place with these people. Many of you will not have medical issues that allow you to learn the personal side of your Doctor or medical staff, I have reached that point with these people. Yes, this is their job to be here but for me they have become friends and support for me and they celebrate my good fortune at this point.
My sister and Mother in law came to visit especially for the evening and it was so special. Kara loved the Survivor March and I was glad she was there. Then there were opening remarks and then they introduced Paige and me and the video of her book. Now she did not actually read the book, live, THANK GOD, because we just weren't sure how she would react live, so it was video taped ahead of time, also to keep the program moving. So there was me and her on the big jumbo screen reading Paige's book. It was really cute and the audience seemed to like it. Erin was funny, she looked up at the screen and said, "Mommy", "Paige", like it was the most common thing to see our faces on a big screen. After that, the keynote speaker, Kelly Corrigan, read a couple chapters from her book and she was funny and touching. After the event was over, Paige was seated right next to Kelly for a book signing. Paige sold her copies of her book and signed each one "Paige" with a little heart over the "I" in her name. She looked so grown up sitting there. Brian and I were proud parents.
All in all, it was a great night. It was exhilarating to be part of this event and have Paige receive such a thrill.
Medically, I am also feeling much better. I still have some symptoms such as puffy eyes, swollen limbs and some occasional lightheadedness. But I have to say my energy is pretty much back and I have gone to the gym again a couple times last week. My strength and stamina are depleted so I have to build that up again. I am going to Physical Therapy twice a week to help move some of this fluid away and out of my system. Not sure if it is working, but I feel good I am doing something proactive. I was definitely, in what I describe as, a "funk" for several weeks. I am not sure if I am back to normal but I am getting there and trying to dig out from all the things I put on the back burner for so many weeks. What I realized is that everyone has tough times. It is not just me and not just cancer giving people troubles in life. Everyone has hardship and life, it doesn't just wait around for you. You have to try and pull yourself up and keep going.
So that is what I am trying to do, keep going.
Love you if you are still reading my blog.
Britt
Anyway, we arrive the evening of the Event and there is a large tent and tables set up with all kinds of things. On one table is the brochure with my face and the kids faces in the cover. The fundraising efforts had paid off, they were able to raise their goal of 4 million dollars!!! We were then invited to meet Kelly ahead of time before the event and so she and Paige spoke for a long time about her advice for a young author. It was cool to have "inside access" and for Kelly to take such an interest in Paige and her book.
Back out at the tent, the cancer survivors gather in the back of the tent for a Survivor March to open the evening. It sounds kind of hokey but it is really a wonderful feeling to walk through that tent with everyone cheering you on. I was so proud to be walking with other women who had fought and won the battle. They play the song "We are the Champions" which is always a tear jerker. The previous year I had walked in the Survivor march, I was in the group of survivors "One day to One year" since diagnosis. This year I was in the group "One year to five years" since diagnosis. I did not cry during the procession until I laid eyes on Brian and he was welled up as if to say "See, look how far we have come". I hugged him tightly and cried a little in spite of myself. I also was able to march with some new friends I had made through support groups and such, so it was nice to be surrounded by people I knew and felt comfortable around. The nurses and Doctors and staff are all people I have become so close to since I have spent so much of my life in this place with these people. Many of you will not have medical issues that allow you to learn the personal side of your Doctor or medical staff, I have reached that point with these people. Yes, this is their job to be here but for me they have become friends and support for me and they celebrate my good fortune at this point.
My sister and Mother in law came to visit especially for the evening and it was so special. Kara loved the Survivor March and I was glad she was there. Then there were opening remarks and then they introduced Paige and me and the video of her book. Now she did not actually read the book, live, THANK GOD, because we just weren't sure how she would react live, so it was video taped ahead of time, also to keep the program moving. So there was me and her on the big jumbo screen reading Paige's book. It was really cute and the audience seemed to like it. Erin was funny, she looked up at the screen and said, "Mommy", "Paige", like it was the most common thing to see our faces on a big screen. After that, the keynote speaker, Kelly Corrigan, read a couple chapters from her book and she was funny and touching. After the event was over, Paige was seated right next to Kelly for a book signing. Paige sold her copies of her book and signed each one "Paige" with a little heart over the "I" in her name. She looked so grown up sitting there. Brian and I were proud parents.
All in all, it was a great night. It was exhilarating to be part of this event and have Paige receive such a thrill.
Medically, I am also feeling much better. I still have some symptoms such as puffy eyes, swollen limbs and some occasional lightheadedness. But I have to say my energy is pretty much back and I have gone to the gym again a couple times last week. My strength and stamina are depleted so I have to build that up again. I am going to Physical Therapy twice a week to help move some of this fluid away and out of my system. Not sure if it is working, but I feel good I am doing something proactive. I was definitely, in what I describe as, a "funk" for several weeks. I am not sure if I am back to normal but I am getting there and trying to dig out from all the things I put on the back burner for so many weeks. What I realized is that everyone has tough times. It is not just me and not just cancer giving people troubles in life. Everyone has hardship and life, it doesn't just wait around for you. You have to try and pull yourself up and keep going.
So that is what I am trying to do, keep going.
Love you if you are still reading my blog.
Britt
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Can't catch a break
Here I am nine days after my surgery and I can 't tell you that I feel 100%. I am pretty discouraged because this surgery was supposed to be all good news. Nice new breasts, no cancer to deal with but of course I have a blood clot that proceeded to knock me on my back for 5-6 straight days. I am making progress but I am still light headed, out of breath and my fingers are tingly. I am not sleeping well from the incisions and I still have puffy eyes in the morning. I go to see Dr. Kahn (Surgeon) on Monday and Dr. Eldaly on Tues so I will get to the bottom of all this.
I will say I am feeling better though, I have more energy and have been able to get back to some normal things. My mom and I took the girls to a local Renaissance faire on Sat. It was fun, tiring but fun. Other than that, I will do some work around the house then have to rest afterward. The other day, I changed my sheets on my bed and once I finished I had to lay down for 20 mins to recover. Now that does not sound like me does it!!
I will say I am feeling better though, I have more energy and have been able to get back to some normal things. My mom and I took the girls to a local Renaissance faire on Sat. It was fun, tiring but fun. Other than that, I will do some work around the house then have to rest afterward. The other day, I changed my sheets on my bed and once I finished I had to lay down for 20 mins to recover. Now that does not sound like me does it!!
Monday, September 14, 2009
Tough coupld of days
Hey all- Well the last step of recovery has had it's ups and downs. Surgery on the 11th was delayed until 2:45pm which meant I had nothing to eat or drink 8-10 hours before at 5 am. My husband was so sweet to make me breakfast let me eat in bed at 5:00 and then fall back asleep. We get to Stanford and get settled in to hospital bed and the surgeon comes in to measure me and draws on my skin all the places he plans to cut,etc. Kind of weird. He plans to do the following: 1) Take out the chem port which I was so excited about. 2)Removed the tissue expander and put in a silicon breast implant. 3) Add a small implant to the right remaining breast to even everything out. My number one goal was symmetry and if they were a little rounder and firmer that great. After a long surgery and long recover time Brian and I left the hospital around 7:30 pm that night getting us home around 9:00.
By then all pharmacies were closed to get my pain meds but I was sure I still had pain meds at the house from previous operations but no such luck, I had one half of one pill. I was in for a long night. We dug up other painkillers but weren't "the good stuff" but I got through the night. Brian again, my knight in shining armor, got up at 5:00am the next morning and drove a hour away to Turlock to a 24 hour pharmacy and got my painkilllers. I was so happy to see him showup with those pills and my breakfast the next day. My Hero.
I was recovering fine, sleepy, swollen. The breasts were not excactly symmetrical and the surgeon warned me about that. I need to wait until the swelling goes down and see how things settle in before deciding how they look. There are so many bandages you can't see much at all anyway. I have two drains again and those get in the way. So as the day goes on I notice my face and eyes swelling up and my neck is bright red and getting larger. Then around 3:00 I realize my arms are real tight like I have a blood presser cuff on. Everything chest level and up is swollen. I don't even look like my self any more, I look like I have gained 30 lbs and in day. I joke I look like a football player with their thick necks.
I call the Dr on call and she is baffled by my description. She calls back and suggests also suggests I go to the ER. So exhausted, Brian and I pack up around 6:00 pm to go to the EM in Turlock. I pack an overnight bag because I am just not sure what to expect anymore. Once at the ER, he does a quick exam and determines the swelling is due to the trama of the surgery and send me home. I put up with it on Sunday, no change. On Monday, Mom and I are back in the car going to see Dr. Eldaly. I am convince there is something going on. the sweelling should be either getting better or getting worse but the fact that it is still the same after 3 days is odd. Dr. Eldaly sees me and sends my for a chest CT, and then an unltrasound. Sure enough, I have a blood clot. It is under my arm where the Port used to be. I am on blood thinners and drugs to reuce the swlling. I am glad I followed up and I am glad the Dr. Eldaly took it to the extra step to be sure it is not a problem. Blood Clots can be very serious.
SOoI am back home now resting and recovering. I don't think I will be going out in public unless I need to due to the intense puffiness. I am tired and sleepy and dizzy so I am keeping it short. More to come but I am doing OK right now. Me and my happy drugs. =)
Britt
By then all pharmacies were closed to get my pain meds but I was sure I still had pain meds at the house from previous operations but no such luck, I had one half of one pill. I was in for a long night. We dug up other painkillers but weren't "the good stuff" but I got through the night. Brian again, my knight in shining armor, got up at 5:00am the next morning and drove a hour away to Turlock to a 24 hour pharmacy and got my painkilllers. I was so happy to see him showup with those pills and my breakfast the next day. My Hero.
I was recovering fine, sleepy, swollen. The breasts were not excactly symmetrical and the surgeon warned me about that. I need to wait until the swelling goes down and see how things settle in before deciding how they look. There are so many bandages you can't see much at all anyway. I have two drains again and those get in the way. So as the day goes on I notice my face and eyes swelling up and my neck is bright red and getting larger. Then around 3:00 I realize my arms are real tight like I have a blood presser cuff on. Everything chest level and up is swollen. I don't even look like my self any more, I look like I have gained 30 lbs and in day. I joke I look like a football player with their thick necks.
I call the Dr on call and she is baffled by my description. She calls back and suggests also suggests I go to the ER. So exhausted, Brian and I pack up around 6:00 pm to go to the EM in Turlock. I pack an overnight bag because I am just not sure what to expect anymore. Once at the ER, he does a quick exam and determines the swelling is due to the trama of the surgery and send me home. I put up with it on Sunday, no change. On Monday, Mom and I are back in the car going to see Dr. Eldaly. I am convince there is something going on. the sweelling should be either getting better or getting worse but the fact that it is still the same after 3 days is odd. Dr. Eldaly sees me and sends my for a chest CT, and then an unltrasound. Sure enough, I have a blood clot. It is under my arm where the Port used to be. I am on blood thinners and drugs to reuce the swlling. I am glad I followed up and I am glad the Dr. Eldaly took it to the extra step to be sure it is not a problem. Blood Clots can be very serious.
SOoI am back home now resting and recovering. I don't think I will be going out in public unless I need to due to the intense puffiness. I am tired and sleepy and dizzy so I am keeping it short. More to come but I am doing OK right now. Me and my happy drugs. =)
Britt
Friday, September 11, 2009
Reconstructive Surgery
Hi Everyone it's Brian. I haven't written for while, I figure it was time to check in, especially on a day like today when Britt was going through re constructive surgery. I have determined that I hate hospitals. Since I have known Britt she has undergone seven surgeries. I am always the same a mixture of dread, and emotion. It never fails that right about the time they wheel her in I become a total mess. The positive is that this represents the end of sorts. The doctor has told me that the outcome of the surgery was good, although they won't it is a very subjective thing, because the true outcome is how Britt sees it. I know it will be tough for her, because no matter what she will not see what she was like before the surgery, there are scars, and scar tissues that will effect it. The best outcome for me would be for her to see her as I see her, as the most beautiful loving person in the world. She has taken on cancer and beaten it, and we have come out stronger as a result.
Friday, September 4, 2009
Guess What
I just got my results back from my Pet/CT from yesterday and they found NO Evidence of Cancer!!!! There was really nothing there. They did see some activity around the tissue expander but felt that was from the surgery site not cancer related. And oh yeah, I also have a ovarian cyst. No big deal, I get them all the time and have had this one for over a year.
This is great news. I was really nervous about this final test because the results were going to drastically change the path of my life, if there was still evidence of cancer. Before I knew I was still getting Chemo and radiation so still knew what I had to do but right now, this late in the game, I have the surgery coming up on the 11th and one final Herceptin treatment on Sept 22nd and THAT IS IT!!!
A big sigh of relief on this one and I wanted to share it all with you. My biggest supporters.
Britt
This is great news. I was really nervous about this final test because the results were going to drastically change the path of my life, if there was still evidence of cancer. Before I knew I was still getting Chemo and radiation so still knew what I had to do but right now, this late in the game, I have the surgery coming up on the 11th and one final Herceptin treatment on Sept 22nd and THAT IS IT!!!
A big sigh of relief on this one and I wanted to share it all with you. My biggest supporters.
Britt
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